Weird question about Facebook...

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Navy Ballerina on April 15, 2012 at 10:53pm

My bf has me and him as "In a relationship" on fb but no one can see it except our friends. and no one can see his family he blocked them from seeing his family. Idk if your bf has to or not but mine has to go through Seers school and while they are their they check every single thing they can about them, their families, their friends, what websites they go on they investigate them like no other. Alot of them change their names, my bf changed his so no one can look him up by his real name. Its just security reasons.

Permalink Reply by meagan5220 on April 15, 2012 at 11:04pm

I can completely understand why your bf would want to keep that private. Its known as PERSEC. Personal Security. Its very simliary to OPSEC. (Operational Security) Personal Security is very important. And something a lot of wives take very lightly. Which is very scary thought to me. Little things like posting how you are home alone and miss him. to you, (not you specifically) just letting your emotions out, to someone trying to get what they want, a lucky break. No matter how private you make your facebook its super easy to see anything and to find out where you are posting from. My facebook is pretty private. I only accept people I know personally or people he confirms he knows. ( we have one fb together)

Permalink Reply by NavyDoll Ebony on April 15, 2012 at 11:14pm

Well i had this problem once before too. I posted a couple things on my bf's wall and i was wondering why he wasnt responding to any of them. I would say things like "I love u" and all that. But one day i just asked him why he wasnt responding to me because i was starting to feel a lil funny about it. But he told me that he doesnt want to put his personal or "love life" on there because alot of different officers and chiefs in the navy see that stuff (he has some as friends) and when they see sailors with girlfriends(not wives) and are happy, they try to do different things to split them up more, like maybe getting stationed somewhere real far away or deployed longer. He said it might have to do with the fact that girlfriends arent a responsibility to the military yet whereas wifes are(they get housing and stuff,plus kids).

Permalink Reply by AshleySuperfly on April 16, 2012 at 12:04am

That's totally makes sense. That's pretty much what he said so I'm glad I wasn't going crazy and thinking he was making up excuses lol!

Permalink Reply by Jess_0411 on April 15, 2012 at 11:15pm

My husband has everything blocked on his facebook, and I'm not allowed to mention his name, rate, or rank on any type of social media. He's huge on PERSEC. My husband doesn't ask for much, so I've learned to understand and accept what little he does ask from me. And if it protects him and his security clearance and job, then whatever.

Permalink Reply by sailorwifenmom on April 16, 2012 at 1:59am

My husband and I have each other listed, and we talk about each other on our facebook pages, but we are both already pretty OPSEC and PERSEC uptight as it is, so it's not a huge deal to either of us - the sort of things I would post aren't a violation, and vice versa.

Like, we do NOT post all this stuff about "going to miss him when he has to leave" or any countdowns to him coming home, anything like that.  (That includes the deployment donut of misery things - we might have them on our computer, but we do not post them online, because once a ship has deployed, it becomes public knowledge when they left, so between the leave date and how the percentages change on the donut, it can be used to calculate when they are due to return...) 

We also have our stuff set to private, and the people on our facebook pages are people we know in person, with very few exceptions to this (like the spouse of a family member who has been married since the last time we were home..) and we also have to approve all tags and stuff from our friends. 

lol - so, with all those parameters that we've put in place for ourselves to begin with, we're pretty relaxed about what we post ;-)

Permalink Reply by MissingmySailor on April 16, 2012 at 11:37am

It's normal and okay.. my husband and I have each other listed, he.doesn't have his job on fb and him and I only friend ppl we know and see on the daily, or people we communicate with like friends and family. I'm always posting on my husbands wall and he enjoys reading them but never responds back because he feels he doesn't need to express himself to me on fb haha we do not post things about what he does, where he is going, personal info like that we don't post. I say I miss him and etc but nothing as to get him introuble or others introuble. I don't bad mouth his career as much as it gets me mad sometimes lol he never really posts anything good if and when he does post a status lol we have our pictures of us ..my fb is pretty private and I will block ppl I don't trust or know that keep trying to add me or my husband.. I have everything set to "Friends only" .. same for my husband. Even tho I'm sure the government can get over all that and find out what they want him & I def follow persec and opsec.. I will post that I'm going to see him or w.e but I don't put where or for how long lol idk everyone feels diff but the main this is to keep yourself safe, your sailor safe and the other sailors he works with safe.

Permalink Reply by MissingmySailor on April 16, 2012 at 11:39am

Sailorwifenmom, same here, your post took the words out my mouth lol