Navy For Moms

Beverly Staton

Boot Camp NIGHTMARE!!!!!!!!

Oh - my - God!!!!!! It was my worst fear. I knew it would happen. Aaron was always a bit impulsive, but this time he had really done it. This was one mess he would not be able to get out of. And all of my concerns had made a shining debut into my/his reality. They were yelling at him over every little thing, he hated the food, the other guys, ALL the Chiefs, all the orders, even the darned bed!!! Now what? In the letter he'd written he wasn't really asking for advice, just angry. And, I think, knowing my son, just maybe, even a way to get out of this situation. I knew I'd have to reply back that same night because I'd quickly ascertained that he, along with other recruits, was pretty much living for the mail. As I read back over his letter I thought back to the years I'd spent raising him. I thought back on Veteran's Day parades I'd taken him to. I remembered all the grocery store and drugstore parking lots where he'd heard me say, "My name is Beverly Staton and this is my son, Aaron, and we just wanted to say 'Thank You'." ("Yes, son, he really did fight in a real war." (age 6), "Firm handshake, son, tells a man everything about you, no matter your age," (to the 10yr. old), "I don't care how old you are and I don't care what he looks like! (age 14), You see that POW on his vest? He paid a price, buried friends & maybe brothers for you to 'choose' to wear what you want to school, so that you can slide by just enough to play basketball at that school you went to free of charge, and so that I had the RIGHT to 'choose' to send you now to a private school." "I don't care how embarrassed you are, what if he is old, he doesn't know you from Adam, either." (that was all ages!) I knew he had never forgotten all those men I walked him up to over the years and had him shake hands with and say 'thank you' to. No matter the protest, each time we'd walked away from another man, another story, I'd seen in his face the way their stories had touched him. I knew he would not have forgotten them or their sacrifices. I picked up my pen and began to reply to my son's last letter. This letter unfolded much differently than others I'd written since he'd arrived at Great Lakes Naval boot camp. I didn't even mention the previous letter he'd sent. I never mentioned his complaints. This is what I did write; I wrote that I bet it was odd thinking you could be standing, at times, in the exact same spot another young man who'd been ordered to choose between the Navy and prison might have stood & gotten yelled at before he went off to make his home on a ship under constant attack. I told him I couldn't imagine eating at a table where young men, not unlike himself, had eaten before. Young men who'd been drafted into Navy service during wartime, against their free will, who'd been sent to a place in a jungle where they might not have eaten for days. I told him I thought it must be hard to learn to trust someone you've just met to guard your backside, whether at boot camp or on deployment. I told him it must be stressful to learn in such a short amount of time so many new things those Chiefs told them they would need to know if something went wrong in a dangerous situation. I told him I just could not fathom sleeping in a bed, in a dorm, so old, where so many young men had slept before him, knowing some had even cried there before falling asleep, missing their moms' and dads', full of their own homesickness. Some only to live only a short while after leaving that place. I told him I would imagine it was beyond strange to be looking out over those grounds and buildings where so many, just like him, had gone before, that at times I would imagine you could almost feel them standing there, beside you. I said I'm sure you must be awestruck thinking on the sheer number of young men who upon leaving that place found the wisdom, the strength and the courage to do more than the jobs they were assigned. And finally, I told him that I bet it made him proud to go where so many heroes had been before. And that I am sure, beyond doubt, that if he should ever be called himself, to find that same wisdom and strength, his own courage would not fail him. Because he too, now stands where many will come after him. Because he too, is now a hero. Within days I got a reply, this time his letter also, was much different than all the others he had written. "Thanks Mom. You were right, you almost can feel them here, almost see them. Kind of makes me feel like I'm on sacred ground. Hey, Momma, don't worry about me, I'm going to be fine. Hey, I met this other guy from Oklahoma! And you would NOT believe this one crazy Chief here ...................."

Tags: bootcamp

Karen Gallagher Comment by Karen Gallagher on March 4, 2008 at 8:08pm
yes we often must remind them why why chose this. The ability to choose this life and yes so many have done this before him and had the same feelings and apprehension and home sick and fatigue that they have now, It is a hard road to walk but it is well worth it in the end
AngieNMx2 Comment by AngieNMx2 on March 5, 2008 at 9:54am
Thanks for the awesome example how we all can encourage our sons and daughters during the tuff times ahead.
Cyndi Riehle Comment by Cyndi Riehle on March 5, 2008 at 10:08am
Wow! What a great story! I had a good cry after reading it. My son has just graduated and is on to A school in Mississipi. He now feels so much pride in what he is doing. You are a great mom and handled the situation perfect! He will be a great sailor.
Navy for Moms Admins Comment by Navy for Moms Admins on March 5, 2008 at 11:03am
Beverly, I actually reached for my tissue when I read this.

And finally, I told him that I bet it made him proud to go where so many heroes had been before. ... Because he too, now stands where many will come after him. Because he too, is now a hero.
This made me smile!

:) Thank you for sharing this with us.
Mary, Proud Mom of Nick Comment by Mary, Proud Mom of Nick on March 5, 2008 at 11:04am
Beverly - what a wise mom you are! Well done.
Molly mom of 2 + 330,701 sailors Comment by Molly mom of 2 + 330,701 sailors on March 5, 2008 at 11:26am
WOW
That gave me chills.
Great letter to send to your son, I now will look at PIR diferently when I get there. I think that I will print that and read that to my family when we are at the gates to PIR.
Beverly Staton Comment by Beverly Staton on March 5, 2008 at 3:11pm
Actually my own tears came pretty easily just before my son left for Japan 3 1/2 yrs ago. He'd already been in the Navy for 3yrs at that time. Before he flew out he spent some time at home and left with me what he was not sure about taking with him at that time. ( still single in those days :) ) Any way, at one point he handed me all the letters I'd written him up until that time. Amazed, I asked him if the Boot Camp letters were also in the bundle. "Oh yeah! You kidding me, Mom? That's the good stuff. Don't let anything happen to those, 'coz you do know I want them back, right? I mean like don't go putting any of them in photo albums and stuff like that. K?" (lol) He had my number at a young age. :) I haven't told him yet, but I just got my hands on an official Navy photo/scrap album and I am going to put those 2 letters in there. .
Donell Comment by Donell on March 5, 2008 at 10:13pm
Wow...you really made me think, too. Even as I type this, I'm still at a loss for words. I'm going to remember this for my own son. Wow...
Brenda Sue Comment by Brenda Sue on March 9, 2008 at 6:59pm
Thanks for this personal letter - I am going to send a similar one to my son!
marie Comment by marie on March 22, 2008 at 12:42am
Dear Beverly, I have some life experience that I thought could provoke one to think out of the box and sometimes not judge one to harshly or oneself. You I must say must be one wonderful person and friend that they could go to you for any advice, how lucky are your family and friends to have you in their lives. What you wrote struck me with awe. Have a great day.Marie

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